Mother, Thou Art Mine Undoing

i can't talk to my mother. she has the attention span of a three-year-old. i try to tell her something, and barely has two words escaped my lips, she butts in and talks about something completely different. take this for example:

me: ma, you know--

ma: (turning to look at TV) wow, look at the Miss Singapore contestants! why that one so chubby?? (turning back at me) like that you can take part also...

me: yes, whatever. you know about--

ma: (turning back to TV) wah, the new season of LOST!

me: yes. i'm--

ma: (still looking at TV) my colleague was saying, "i watched LOST till i got lost!" and i told her, "that's why it's called LOST mah!"

me: i'm trying to--

ma: (turning to me) you cut your hair, is it?

me: er yes, last week. you know--

ma: (turning to TV) isn't it great that Singapore won gold, silver and bronze for table tennis?

me: MA!!! I'M TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING!!!

ma: (turning back to me) then just say it lah!! you don't have to be so rude right?

me: i was trying to tell you but you just KEPT TALKING!!!!

ma: was i talking? i wasn't talking at all! i was waiting for you to tell me your news.

me: yes you were, and you made me forget what i wanted to say.

ma: you're damn blur leh. you're only nineteen and your memory is so bad.

sometimes, i fear that my mother is becoming senile. and the truth is, i didn't forget what i wanted to say. i just told her i forgot, because it's no point telling her. she'd just butt in again before i can even begin to speak.