Mother, Thou Art Mine Undoing

i can't talk to my mother. she has the attention span of a three-year-old. i try to tell her something, and barely has two words escaped my lips, she butts in and talks about something completely different. take this for example:

me: ma, you know--

ma: (turning to look at TV) wow, look at the Miss Singapore contestants! why that one so chubby?? (turning back at me) like that you can take part also...

me: yes, whatever. you know about--

ma: (turning back to TV) wah, the new season of LOST!

me: yes. i'm--

ma: (still looking at TV) my colleague was saying, "i watched LOST till i got lost!" and i told her, "that's why it's called LOST mah!"

me: i'm trying to--

ma: (turning to me) you cut your hair, is it?

me: er yes, last week. you know--

ma: (turning to TV) isn't it great that Singapore won gold, silver and bronze for table tennis?

me: MA!!! I'M TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING!!!

ma: (turning back to me) then just say it lah!! you don't have to be so rude right?

me: i was trying to tell you but you just KEPT TALKING!!!!

ma: was i talking? i wasn't talking at all! i was waiting for you to tell me your news.

me: yes you were, and you made me forget what i wanted to say.

ma: you're damn blur leh. you're only nineteen and your memory is so bad.

sometimes, i fear that my mother is becoming senile. and the truth is, i didn't forget what i wanted to say. i just told her i forgot, because it's no point telling her. she'd just butt in again before i can even begin to speak.

Get Medieval On Thy Ass

i think the best gift someone could do for me is to write me an opera. like what andrew lloyd webber did for sarah brightman. he wrote her a musical. but i'd like a full-length opera and call it Zoot la Triumphant or something like that.

why? because come on, writing me just a little song isn't enough. anyone can write a song. but it takes a genius to write an opera. and i like genii.

and because i'm my biggest fan, i'm going to write an opera for myself. tra-la-la!

Giveth A Little Respect

the 80's song A Little Respect by Erasure has been running through my head the whole bloody fucking day.

thatchugimmeno thatchugimmeno thatchugimmeno sooooooooouuuul
i hear you caaaaaaaaaalliiiiiiiiiiiiing
oh baby pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaase
give a little respect tooooooooo meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

anyway i went to see michelle at lido (again!) today and bought 3 mascaras and an eyelash base. yup. i bought 4 lash things in one day. spent about a hundred bucks ON MY EYELASHES. but they look fucking great now. so the lesson of the day is: the more shit you put on your eyelashes, the thicker and longer they become, but you must put the right shit on.

there are so many makeup items i want to get because i'm running out. and also i finally discovered and understood the reason why 1 of each item is not enough. so now i need to get:

1. eyebrow pencil
2. pencil eyeliner (black and brown)
3. powder highlighter
4. cream highlighter
5. dark contouring powder
6. lip gloss (tube kind and wand kind)
7. loose powder
8. pressed powder
9. liquid foundation
10. metal eyelash comb
11. that particular black/grey/white eyeshadow compact
12. lip pencil (red, pink and nude)

every girl needs some face paint, and i just like having lots of it. tra-la-la!

When A Man Loveth A Man

to question homosexuality we must also question religions, and ultimately question the existence of God.

is the bible the word of God? why must the Bible be the word of God? why did God only appear then? why didn't God appear when life appeared on earth? so did everyone before Jesus Christ go to hell? why is God, the Almighty, being so cruel then? christianity began as a cult. then its followings grew, and it became a religion. similar religions like Judaism and Islam i.e. Judeo-Christian religions suppresses and condemns other religions as pagan and devil-worshipping. if a cult grew in following, and becomes a widely-accepted belief, does that become the truth? there are so many people all over the world, and God, who is "fair and just", only appeared to the Hebrews? so the pantheon of gods common to the Greeks, Romans, Egyptians, Indians, Chinese, Babylonians and Africans, they are all faces of the devil. does this mean that God, the Almighty, the fair and the just, has allowed all these peoples to go to Hell? then if God created everything, surely homosexuality is a creation on God's part?

are women biologically inferior to men? women and men have the same basic living organs, and the only distinguishing factors are the sexual organs. why? because humans need to procreate. the two sexes are to ensure reproduction and survival of the human race. so then a woman is every bit as important as a man, and man's equal. is a female dog inferior to a male dog? is a female cat inferior to a male cat?

therefore why is it that in Judeo-Christian societies, women are considered inferior? did God intend for that to be so? but God is fair and just, isn't He? some people claim that men's bodies are built to work and protect and fight, while women's bodies are built to bear babies and nurture and care, therefore men, being stronger, is superior. however, men are unable to do what women do. so does this now mean that women, being able to carry life and nourish life, are superior? neither is correct. men and women are equal. one can do what the other can't. therefore no sex is superior or inferior. why then are women considered lowly compared to men then, in Judeo-Christian societies?

why is God male? does that say anything about His justness and fairness for being a male?

okay i'm going to eat my tuna sandwich now, bye-bye.

Thus Quoth Lord Jeekon

beauty is only skin-deep; beneath that is gross anatomy.

my brother i.e. smartest person in the world according to me, said the above line (because he is a medical student, and he has to study bones and flesh etc). isn't that so true? our beauty is determined upon the skin stretched over our muscles and bones etc. oh yeah the way our muscles and bones lie also contribute to our final outcome, but come on. how pretty is a skinless person? you can have a gorgeous bone structure, but without your skin people just think you're a freak.

what is wrong with plastic surgery? i don't see what's wrong with surgically enhancing one's features, or even completely changing one's face (as long as one isn't an axe murderer/terrorist running away from the law). we aren't interfering with God's work. if it were, God wouldn't have allowed us to discover plastic surgery, innit?

people say, love yourself, be yourself etc. i loved myself when i had small eyes and single eyelids with cysts growing in them. you can ask my friends and family. i loved myself so much that i have a bruise on my back from patting myself so hard. but now that i have cyst-free double eyelids i love myself even more.

about the be yourself part, i'm still the same person i am. i am still myself. my outward appearance may change, but my character and personality remains fixed. it's like clothes. you put on clothes and take them off, but your body still remains the same body underneath the clothes. you paint your face with makeup and wash it off; your face still stays on your head.

can you imagine washing your face, and your eyes, nose and lips just dissolve with the soap suds and get splashed off with water, and you end up with just a blank expanse of skin where your face was?

that had no relevance to my argument, but i just felt like saying it.

anyway i'm too lazy to continue writing. tra-la-la.